The Bears lived high in the clouds—soft, fluffy, pink clouds—in a sleepy little village called the Kingdom of Caring. Nobody really knew where the name came from…it just was. Nobody much cared, either. The Bears were too preoccupied with spreading love among the earthly realm.
They secreted this strange, sticky substance, bone white and with the viscosity of snot. They went down and tackled the first people they saw. Little youngsters who hadn’t yet discovered their sexualities would happen across their crotches one day. Teenagers grit their teeth. Their hands brushed alongside another’s flank, chest or backside. Discovery.
The plushy clouds exuded thick fumes of atmosphere that gave the Bears this ethereal, orgiastic sensation. They thought it would be novel to provide a similar sensation for the humans…which they couldn’t perfect, but it came in many forms, nonetheless. One day the Bears tossed magic sesame seeds across the earth. Little, 7-leaved plants sprung up on the sides of highways. Weirdos got industrious and started collecting match-heads. Hoarding Sudafed. Suddenly, fields of poppies burst up through the soil of Afghanistan.